My mom was a teacher, my grandmother was a teacher, so therefore, with my typical challenging spirit, I vowed never to be a teacher. When I was young, I saw how teaching made my mom so busy, wore her down, and took her away from me.  I wanted more attention, and I saw that attention pulling away from me and towards my mom’s work and students.  Being an excellent teacher requires devotion, dedication, and emotional and creative energy. And. But. Yet. Teaching found me. My mom and I are cut from the same cloth, and the joy she found in teaching also speaks to me. I really love learning, and I love to share that experience of loving learning with others.

In my former administrative position, I was asked to share my “why” with the teachers and the district’s leadership team. I mulled over this “why” in my head a lot (still do), trying to determine why I landed in education, in East Oakland. What about my values and beliefs makes me want to work in underserved communities in Oakland?

My school experience wasn’t my inspiration to become an educator, like it is for many. I haven’t always loved school, but I went to school,  made friends, and did what I was supposed to do. I’ve gone to public schools and private schools, well-run schools, and poorly managed schools. Schools where I had inquiry & project based learning, and schools where rote learning was elevated. My elementary and middle school experience was marked by transition, some pretty gruff teachers, and bland learning. I had a 6th grade teacher that slept all of class on most days; I didn’t learn much that year.

But here I was as an instructional administrator, with over 10 years of teaching under my belt, sharing with a room full of people why I was there, as one of their leaders.  I bombed in the moment– rattling on about my dad as a pastor and my mom as a teacher. If I had a do over, I would imagine I would share some to this effect:

1. I’m an educator because I love to see that spark in kids (and in my own learning) where an idea is had, a connection is made, progress takes course. In high school I remember learning about Japanese Internment in America for the first time. Most of my classes I typically spent trying to get a glance at a guy I liked or writing a note to a friend, but this, made me pay attention. We watched a video clip about the internment in my history class.  Finally I was learning something that was deep, meaningful, and something that surprised me. As a teacher and a mom, I like to talk about this type of American history. I find joy in pushing someone’s thinking further, deeper, to a place that didn’t know they could go. Connections are a powerful took for learning. Connecting to a human experience, linking ideas together and finding a pattern, or connecting a collection of thoughts to a symbol or a larger idea.  I believe these moments as a learner should be happening as much as possible, and that teachers need to create the space to foster these moments. The sparks that happen in learning bring joy to both the student and the teacher, and build relationship, community, trust, and encourage creative thinking.
2. The place I have chosen to be an educator reflects my belief that equitable, rigorous, loving schools and communities are essential. I know that currently our schools in Oakland and across the country are created to be inequitable. My work in schools have been about providing rigorous, engaging learning to all kids- kids that have IEPs, are English Language Learners, or kids 3-4 years behind in reading. We have a great divide in our schools along racial and economic lines.  White, more affluent school have resources, encourage creative thinking, push rigorous learning, while more diverse schools, or schools with more kids of color tend to be under-resourced, have a high teacher turnover rate, and usually teach in a more routinized, less conceptual way. I’m a white lady, I have always been a white lady, and will always be a white lady. All of my teaching and leading experience for the past 20 years has been with underserved kids of color in Oakland. I always grapple with this- am I in the right place? I am aware of who I am, the space I take up (usually too much), and the privilege I carry with me. I try to step back and step up when appropriate, but ya know, I get things wrong a lot too.  Should I be working with kids and families that are like me? Maybe. The only white kids I have worked with are my own.  And, especially in our current political climate, what I intend and what I hope is hard to reconcile with reality. Some of my students feel that Donald Trump favors me and hates them- are they wrong? All of that to say, we need educators that know our educational system is broken. We need educators that know they are a work in progress, just like their students. Educators that know that ALL children deserve consistent, prepared teachers. That ALL children deserve educators who care about what they think, and push them to become original and creative idea-havers. That ALL children are not that same and need learning that is engaging and challenging to them. That ALL educators have bias and that ALL educators need to proactively work to recognize and mitigate that bias. I  could go on and on. These beliefs I have run deep, have been refined over the years, but stem from values that my parents, my childhood church, my childhood homes in Chula Vista and Philadelphia, and my life experiences impressed onto me. ALL people, children especially, are to be valued, seen, and invested into. 
3. I believe that committing to a community is important.  Communities are not only lifelines to adults, they are essential places for kids to find belonging and support. The school does not have to be the only place where our kids find this belonging. Schools, neighborhoods, and faith communities provide a safe place for kids to be seen, learn, grow, thrive. Growing up I didn’t like school much, but I felt cared for at my church. I blossomed and was a leader in church spaces, and I got the mentorship and support that I craved from my faith community.  But for many, without these other communities, the school becomes the place where a child looks to find belonging.  We need to proactively create safe, loving, welcoming communities where all children feel that they belong. Being loved, being seen, belonging somewhere helps us all feel whole. And we want to grow kids that feel whole and accepted for who they are.

What I read, what I say, what I do comes from these beliefs. As I start to write more and more in this space, I hope to share more with you- maybe some resources that are helpful, a perspective that gives you another take, or an idea that gets you thinking.

And while I had some jealousy of  my mom’s work with her students, I know that my mom was and is an excellent teacher. She knew how to “spark joy” (thank you, Marie Kondo) with her students. She knew how to push her students’ thinking while creating a loving, safe community. So maybe my mom was my inspiration after all, and maybe it’s about time I gave her credit.

We are all in this together. And I believe that we must give our absolute best every day, because it matters to so many when we do, we just may not see it quite yet.